Deep in the throws of the holiday season, my husband Terry and  8 year old son Scout and I went shopping, ending our holiday spree with dinner at one of our favorite restaurants, Brio.  The atmosphere was loud and festive, everyone celebrating the season. But, at our table we were having a different conversation.

Scout settled in with his calamari appetizer and his crayons while Terry and I got into a discussion about money and whether we were going to make a concerted effort to put some aside to buy a new home in the coming year.  The discussion included budget cuts here and there and comments like”I need to know this is a goal we both have” and  ”Unless we make some cuts in monthly expenditures this isn’t going to happen” a few heated whispers, not nearly as light of a conversation as one would like to have on a holiday weekend night with your family but, you know, sometimes that happens.  While we talked about building a newer, bigger home our son was busy making a list of his own.

Our conversation concluded over salad stealthy put in front of us by our waiter.  I looked over at Scout who had not been coloring after all but, making a list, a list of life goals.

Life Goals

Help poor people

Stop Animal Testing

Help Endangered Animals

From the mouth of babes.  Humbled by our son, we told him how impressed we were with his goals and on his cue we launched into conversation more fitting of the season.  The truth is, while broad, his goals came from his heart, his soul, his very being.  We intend to help him work on his goals by offering him opportunities to impact all three.  For instance, for  Christmas, we donated money to the World Wild Life Fund in his name to save endangered tree frogs in South America.  It was the best gift of Christmas.

Those are the kinds of goals we all need to move ourselves forward, goals that resonate with our souls.  When we uncover those dreams, goals, desires we need to take care to break it down into mini goals, if we don’t,  it is human nature to get discouraged by the enormity of the goal and give up.   Not you, not this year.

In 2012 I wish for you the ability and where with all to make an impact on something dear to your heart.  I wish you  abundance and success in all of your endeavours. Happy Happy New Year.

Wake Up Momma!….this is your life!

Robin is a life coach living in the Columbus, Ohio area.  She specializes in coaching and inspiring woman to rediscover who they really are and live the life they were intended.  Robin studied life coaching with Martha Beck the bestselling author and O Magazine contributor.  If you would like to reach Robin you can email her at robin@wakeupmomma.com.

Halloween is over, all that remains is the trick or treat candy lurking in the bowl in the pantry.  Thanksgving is right around the corner and then it’s Christmas.    Are you filled with joy and anticipation? If your answer is yes, then you probably don’t need to read any further.  If your answer is no then read on….

10 Tips to Feel More Joy this Holiday Season

1. Set Your Limits-  You love to wrap gifts but you despise the obligatory white elephant gift exchange at work.  You love to bake cookies but you wish Hallmark would end the printing of Holiday Greeting Cards because frankly you don’t want to lick another one.   Then don’t.  Committ to doing the holiday activities you love and use the Three B’s Tool for everything else.
2. Set a Budget-  Do it and stick to it.  20 years from now it’s not going to matter how much you spent on which child or other family /friend, what matters is you spent the special time with them.  Cliche… a bit,  but, I don’t know a cliche that is truer than that.
3. Take 15 minutes a day for yourself- Simple, but do you do it?  You would be better served with an hour but most people won’t put themselves that high on their to do list.  Just 15 minutes to center yourself and do something you enjoy.
4. Give a Little Back-   Visit a family shelter or other children’s center.  Take your family and do some volunteering.  Read stories, make crafts, just spend some time with people who don’t have as much as you, believe me, there is always someone who is struggling more than we are.  Reach out.
5. Create Wonder-  Leave cookies and milk out for Santa (even if your kids question), leave carrots for the reindeer, really read The Christmas Story  or The Story of Chanuka and think about the magic in it.  Adopt an elf and let it reek elfin havoc.
6. Have a snowball fight, make snow angels, build a snow fort that you can crawl into.
7. Create something with your hands.  Give it as a gift.
8. Establish a new family tradition, like eating Chinese Food on Christmas Eve (one of my family’s holiday tradtions)  or celebrating Boxing Day the day after Christmas.
9. Hold a family game tournament throughout the holiday season.  Scrabble, Chess, Monopoly, whatever your family enjoys,  keep track of  everyone’s record and allow the winner to choose a special outing before school starts again.
10. Focus on what makes you feel good.

80    days until the end of the year.  80 days left to make the changes you were hoping to make in 2011.    What are you waiting for?  Start Now!

The research suggests that it takes 21 days to adopt a new habit.  Let’s say you bite your finger nails and one of your resolutions was to stop, well,  you have plenty of time to put hot sauce under your nails whatever the prevailing wisdom is to stop biting your finger nails before the end of 2011.

Maybe you can kill two birds with one stone and replace your bad habit with a new activity you vowed you would learn how to do this year…say knitting, or photography, tennis or learning Chinese.  Whatever it is for you, do it….you have plenty of time.

So what will it be?  Are you going to have the same list of resolutions and goals as you begin 2012?  Or are you going to meet your dreams and plans head on and blaze a trail?  It’s up to you  and there is plenty of time.    Wake up Momma!  This is your life!

Robin is a life coach living in the Columbus, Ohio area.  She specializes in coaching and inspiring woman to rediscover who they really are and live the life they were intended.  Robin studied life coaching with Martha Beck the bestselling author and O Magazine contributor.  If you would like to reach Robin you can email her at robin@wakeupmomma.com.

The world lost an amazing man last night.    Honor him, by doing what you can to change the world.  Watch this for a little inspiration.

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Weightloss is the Number One Resolution!

Since mentioning the  100 day march to the end of 2011, I’ve gotten several emails from readers of WUM letting me in on the resolutions that they don’t want to have on their list in 2012.  No surprise, the number one resolution is weightloss or feeling healthy and fit .  I’m in your corner!  I know that accomplishing that goal leads to all sorts of other wonderful feelings and I am ready to help you any way I can!  Below are some ideas, some you probably already know, some are techy , some are common sense.  Let me know if you adopt any of  them in your 100 day challenge !

1.  Write a WUM Health and Fitness Pact.  Copy it and stick it  anywhere you need to be reminded of your fitness goals!  If you would like an example here is my own WUM Pact .

2.  Take up a new sport.  Combining goals to build new friendships and health and fitness “kill two birds with one stone”.   Take up Zumba, join the local gym and  get in on a pick up basketball game building friendships and burning calories, doesn’t get much better!

3. Create time for exercise.   If you are always waiting for your child at one practice or another, take the opportunity to get a walk or a run it.  Why should your child get all of the exercise and have all of the fun.  Better yet volunteer to coach your son or daughters team!  Get up a half hour earlier to get your cardio in or some other weight bearing exercise.  I know it seems earlier but after you’re done you will feel great!

4.  Keep a Food Journal.   Daily chronical what you ate and what you did for exercise.  It helps you focus on eating well and moving more.  If your a techi download the LiveStrong Ap on your smart phone.  This app allows you to track your food, weight and exercise each day.   You put in your profile and your fitness goals and it tells you how many calories you should shoot for each day.

5.  Mind your mouth….  another ap for your smart phone called 80 Bites (although it will cost you .99 cents)  you tap your touch screen everytime you take a bite.  It encourages you to take 80 bites per day.  25 or fewer at meal times and 12 max for snacks.  The idea goes into the philosophy of mindful eating you pause everytime you take a bite noticing at what point you aren’t hungry anymore.

6.  Purchase a new Zero Scale.  This scale keeps your weight a secret.  It records the number when you first step on , then on subsequent days it reveals how many pounds you have gained or lost allowing you to think about your progress instead the constant reminder of how much you still want to loose.

7.  Bet on yourself!  A Stickk.com another new app (free) that allows you to shoose a weightloss goal, a wager and a friend to keep tabs.  Miss your weight loss goal and the money goes to your friend or charity!

8.  Create an energy maximizing playlist on your Ipod or other Mp3 player.  Choose music that moves you!  I love to listen to my favorite pumped up tunes when I’m working out, cleaning the house etc…   Below are some of my favorites.

Just Can’t Get Enough      The Black Eyed Peas

Born this Way         Lady Gaga

Run the World (girls)     Beyonce

Last Friday Night       Katy Perry

Amazing     Kanye West

Jump       Nelly

It’s a Girl Thing      Jesse Lee

Winner        T.I. and Justin Timberlake

9.  Drink at least 8 glasses of water a day.   Swap energy drinks for plain cold water.  Energy drinks give you a temporary boost, when it wears off you crash.  Opt for plain cold water to wake you up and keep you going.

10.    Sleep.   If you aren’t getting enough sleep it’s hard to get healthy and loose that weight.  How much sleep a night do you need?   Shoot for 8.

Hope some of these help you acheive your health and fitness resolutions!

Wake up Momma!….this is your life!

Robin is a life coach living in the Columbus, Ohio area.  She specializes in coaching and inspiring woman to rediscover who they really are and live the life they were intended.  Robin studied life coaching with Martha Beck the bestselling author and O Magazine contributor.  If you would like to reach Robin you can email her at robin@wakeupmomma.com.

Childlike Wonder

Feeling awe, and experiencing magic often comes from doing or seeing something that you don’t have a template for in your mind.  We can also feel those feelings by learning and understanding the process of how something, like, swallowing happens.  When you understand, you are amazed that our bodies actually were made to do that.   You can find awe and wonder in your every day life if you choose too, you just need to look and listen.  Below is a list of everyday things that never fail to fill me up with the wonder of it all…

15 Awe Inspiring Things Happening Right Now

“The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me.” ~ Ayn Rand

So many of my clients exhibit signs of being the proverbial wall flower.  Waiting for the man to find her, waiting for the boss to recognize her worth or waiting to be befriended by a new best friend.    As women we are often taught by watching our mothers and other  females  to always consider others first and never rock the boat.   We often develop a  paralyzing fear of having and expressing an opinion, so we wait.

Somewhere along the line many of us were  imprinted with the idea that we must accommodate everyone, never make a scene, never make anyone feel bad, or worst of all, uncomfortable.  In Teri Hatcher’s book Burnt Toast, she describes a memory of her mother eating the toast she burnt so that nobody else had to.   Instead  of  ”making more toast”,  women accept the way things are and don’t inconvenience anyone by changing it.

I’m embarrassed to say I caught myself the other day  admonishing my daughter for being aggressive and making someone feel bad.   She has a story  she loves to tell about a mock trial tournament where she was a defense attorney and succeeded in making the prosecuting attorney cry by aggressively shouting objections.  The other attorney was new to the mock trial scene and my daughter laughed with delight,  ”I was in the zone, I made her cry!”

” Aly!  Did you really need to make so many objections…couldn’t you have let her win some???” I said.

Ouch! from the mouth of me, the personal coach, wanting my daughter to “let someone else win” wanting her to put a towel over her  own light so that it wouldn’t shine as bright.  It’s not that I want her to be accommodating of others feelings all of the time,  it’s just that  I want here to do it without delighting in others disappointment and frustration.  Perhaps that is what should separate the women from the men.  Being aggressive, shining bright, choosing ourselves but not delighting in the misery our “opponents” may feel when we succeed…..hmmm……..   However, some where along the line I must have taught her to choose herself because my comment has fallen on deaf ears.  She is direct and moving in the direction she wants to take her life.

So, here is your mission should you choose to accept it,  unlearn these wall flower tendencies, express your needs, dreams and opinions and find a way to fulfill them.

If you have an idea, do it,  don’t wait for someone to ask you to do it,  choose yourself.

If you see a need in the world , figure out a way to fill it,  don’t sit back and wait for someone else.

Yearning for new friends?  Don’t wait for them to find you, actively seek them out by joining groups where the kind of people you are looking for hang out.  Same thing goes for male conpanionship,  go where you may find someone that shares an interest with you.   Choose yourself, don’t wait to be chosen.

Don’t wait for permission, Don’t wait for someone to choose you, choose yourself.

Oh yeah, and one more thing, never eat burnt toast….

Robin is a life coach living in the Columbus, Ohio area.  She specializes in coaching and inspiring woman to rediscover who they really are and live the life they were intended.  Robin studied life coaching with Martha Beck the bestselling author and O Magazine contributor.  If you would like to reach Robin you can email her at robin@wakeupmomma.com.

History is full of brave, passionate people that have died in a blaze of glory standing up for what they believed in.   People who let everyone know what they thought was worth dying for by how they lived their life…however long or short it was.

What is worth dying for?    That  can be a tough question to answer one rarely gets to choose how or when they die and whether it’s for something they believe in.  The majority of us just die whenever it’s our time.

So, since we rarely get to choose how we die, why not choose what we live for?????

How about you….What are you willing to live for?

If you were allowed to pursue only one passion in this lifetime what would it be?

Genuinely living for something day after day is something we can choose to do.

So, which will it be for you….die in a blaze of glory or live your life for something you feel passionate about?

Wake up momma!  This is your life!

Robin is a life coach living in the Columbus, Ohio area.  She specializes in coaching and inspiring woman to rediscover who they really are and live the life they were intended.  Robin studied life coaching with Martha Beck the bestselling author and O Magazine contributor.  If you would like to reach Robin you can email her at robin@wakeupmomma.com.

From the start of this coaching blog I have planned on regularly spotlighting individuals who wake up every morning excited to start their day.  A person who started doing one thing and then woke up to the possibility of doing something totally different and thrived.   I am thrilled to be writing today about a woman I first read about in the April edition of MoneyMagazine.  Her name is Susan E. Bukacek, Chef /Owner of The Soup Restaurant in Racine, Wisconsin.  (www.thesouprestaurant.com)

WUM: So Susan, give the readers of Wake-up Momma a little background on you and how you started The Soup.

SB: When my former company was bought out by a larger company, I immediately looked for another job.  Little did I know that I would embark upon a new career.  Having worked for decades in Corporate Communications, I immediately assumed that field would be my next job, too.  The Midwest economy in 2009 was in the tubes and I felt fortunate to have found another company where I would serve as its Director of Media Communications.

My children were less than enthused.  To them, it meant continued nannies, a long commute for their mother with little flexibility, and all the stressors that had invaded our daily lives.  When I told them the news, that mommy was starting a new job, the dinner table went silent.  I was a hands-on single mother and in my mind at the time I was elated that our mortgage would continue to get paid, health insurance wouldn’t lapse, and food would be on our table.  I really couldn’t grasp that my children were not thinking of those things—they were only worried that their mother would again be away from them from early morning until dinner time.

The very next morning, my daughter Helena, age 5 at the time, looked me in the eye as I was braiding her hair.  “Mama,” she asked, “Can’t you just stay home and make soup?”  For whatever reason, I listened.  Her question seemed so plausible though to this day I’m not sure what made me listen.  It was a spiritual chiropractic moment.  “Yes,” I responded, “I suppose that I could.”

The rest of the week was a blur.  I looked for properties in our local downtown that might serve as an adequate space.  I contacted every person I knew in my 44 years on this planet and queried as to whether some one could connect me with a high-end restaurant owner.  Sure enough, friends of friends put me in touch with people they knew who actually succeeded in what I wanted to launch—a healthful, wholesome restaurant that inspired, educated and connected customers with global food that was made fresh, by me.  I interviewed these restaurant owners and quickly knew that I could pursue my dream, too.  For me, the secret to The Soup’s success was to create a focused business plan and execute it.  At the time, that meant taking my passion for fresh food and soup and serving it to the public.  I would serve 5 specialty soups each day, based upon market ingredients that were readily available.  It meant not being beholden to a menu, but rather a concept, an idea of freshness.

Since then, and only when I mastered the 5 soups, did I expand our daily offerings to include specialty salads, sandwiches, and unique market-to-table selections inspired by product availability and my own creativity.

WUM: What advice would you give to someone who wants to follow her passion?

SB:  I believe that there is an internal  compass in each of us—a guidepost if you will that speaks and it is our job to listen.  My daughter was the instrument through which I was able to channel my inner compass.  There has not been one moment, not one, where I questioned the integrity of the internal messages of this guidepost—particularly as it pertains to The Soup.  When something is right, you know it.  That is not to say “rightness” will come easily or without hard work and unexpected hurdles.  But there is a difference in working toward something that inherently feels good for you versus working toward something that is and feels fruitless.

I certainly have encountered fear and uncertainty with regard to my choices, but I have processed those and not succumbed to them.  When you know something is right for you—whatever that might be—a career move, a choice in partners, a parenting decision—then that inner compass directs you.  When I’ve embraced that centeredness for lack of a better term, I have been successful.  I would encourage everyone to seek that feeling out and act upon it.

WUM: “What books or individuals inspire you?”

SB:  I am inspired daily by people who take the time to work through their issues so that they don’t bring those issues to the table—the home table, the work table, the life table.  We are such imperfect souls and our goal should be to understand our imperfections so that we grow and learn.  Life is hard!  They don’t call it “growing pains” for nothing!!

I believe that when we know better, we do better.  Georgia O’Keeffe is a woman who has moved me since I first discovered her work 3 decades ago.  She is so much more than just flowers, or just paint.  She was a renegade who lived her truth and inspired others to do the same.  Her fluidity of self, her fierce independence and her willingness to follow her own path has continued to fuel me as I daily embark upon my personal journey.

Another woman I’ve recently become impassioned with is Gabrielle Hamilton, owner and chef at Prune restaurant in New York.  Her book Blood, Bones & Butter:  The Inadvertent Education of a Reluctant Chef is a magnificent memoir.  She seems to embody the grit and soul that it takes to carve out an individual niche and to settle for nothing less than what is best for you.  She’s an imperfect perfection that spurs me to create better, cook better, and stick to what I know as opposed to following trends or others’ ideas of what is right for me or for The Soup.

WUM: “Being a single mom with a young thriving business can take a lot out of anyone!   How do you recharge?”

SB:  Recharging is integral, yet often can find a seat on the back burner.  It’s a constant challenge for me to sit still, in the calm of life, when so much about the restaurant reality is to put out fires!  My balance comes from consciously looking my children in the eye.  Children miraculously live in the moment at most times, and that’s a great skill that we can learn from as adults with our chaotic lives.

When I am feeling totally overwhelmed or sad or hectic, I seek my children out.  Giving them a hug, listening to their stories of their days is quite soothing.  They also are my anchor…when I feel caught up in choppy waters, I look into their eyes and am reminded of my true mission, which is to serve them and their potential in the best way that I know and am able.  It’s an ongoing life lesson and one that I would not trade for anything!

I’ve also a wonderful partner…he is a calming center and I’m often recharged just by sitting next to him, still, quiet, and secure in the knowledge that we are forging a continually new and vibrant life together.  This is not a life without stress or upset, but a life wherein we are both committed to inspiring each other and creating a net positive.  We’ve defined from the onset that our intent—as in to daily act with intention—is to enhance each other’s lives and passions.  Committing to that daily act is both grounding and recharging!  It requires a mindfulness and a willingness to act with a selflessness that is not grounded in martyrdom, but in inspiration.

I know it sounds silly, but I also will just hug and smell my dogs.  Their sweet souls are a bit of nectar when I feel the crazies of the day hounding me.  Additionally, getting out to walk, breathe, stretch and just “be” alone is imperative.  My business is all about serving the public, so sometimes it’s critical to sit with my own thoughts and feelings and acknowledge their power.  As I embark upon this next chapter of my life, I’ve learned the difference between being alone and being lonely—the former is not a bad thing, the latter is a choice.

WUM: What is your ultimate dream for yourself and for your business?

SB: I am a firm believer in not limiting one’s self, or one’s life.  Life is as large and as open and positive as we choose to make it.  It can also be as narrow and as finite as we choose to make it.  As such, I dream big and I do not choose to put parameters around those dreams.  I’ve learned the intent for me is to continue to create, as a mother, a chef, a partner, a woman.  My goal is to stretch and grow even when I don’t want to.   I intend to continue to live a life with intent.  The ultimate dream is to have followed my inner compass and to know when I am acting in truth as opposed to just acting.  When I do that, success follows.

I hope you enjoyed my conversation with Susan! Please visit her on Facebook, the Web at www.thesouprestaurant.com or if you find yourself in Racine, Wisconsin visit her restaurant.  The Soup is located at 309 Main Street.  Wake up Momma!….this is your life!

Robin is a life coach living in the Columbus, Ohio area.  She specializes in coaching and inspiring woman to rediscover who they really are and live the life they were intended.  Robin studied life coaching with Martha Beck the bestselling author and O Magazine contributor.  If you would like to reach Robin

As I’ve  grown up I’ve pondered certain questions from time to time.  Questions whose answers we simply can’t know for sure.

There are some people who think they have it all figured out, but,  the truth is, these are questions which will never be truly answered until death comes knocking and we let it in.  (This is an excerpt from a page in my journal)

Questions to Ask God:

1.  Does everything that happens to us happen for a reason? (ie illness, accidents, lose of loved ones too soon)   Or are they accidents?

2.  Why do you allow hurricanes, earthquakes, tsunami’s and other natural disasters?

3.  Are there angels sent to earth?  You know like in the movie “It’s a Wonderful Life”?

4.  Did you give some people the ability to read minds, see the future?  Are Psychics for real?

5.  Do you have a plan for everyone?

6.  Did you create a  soul mate for everyone?

7.  Am I allowed to go back to earth and live again?

8.  Why did you only give us 24 hours in a day?

9.  Why  does war exist?

10. Do people really have out of body experiences?

11.  Are ghosts real?

12.

I’m still working on my list of questions for God…Do you have any to add?  Wake up Momma….this is your life?

Robin is a life coach living in the Columbus, Ohio area.  She specializes in coaching and inspiring woman to rediscover who they really are and live the life they were intended.  Robin studied life coaching with Martha Beck the bestselling author and O Magazine contributor.  If you would like to reach Robin you can email her at robin@wakeupmomma.com.